Foreign Investors, please value your billions as I value my hundreds. Book a prepaid cab at the airport. Don't be disheartened if it takes 45 minutes to reach the airport hotel, a stone throw away; improbable patrons like me have the fortune of admiring such luxury only from the outside. Get your children along. They will enjoy the bumpy car ride, courtesy, potholes that are carefully crafted after annual investments worth crores. Bombay is India's commercial capital. There's... a difference between Burhan Wani and the PM speak on Akash Vani. Tur dal is grown in Mozambique, and Nawaz is eternally under the influence of ISI-mark opium. Gods in gold and diamond-studded jewellery welcome commoners like me, every year; their hoardings are scheduled to come up soon. Notice the amazing shape and size of moustaches and expressions that the Gods display; these are subject to change every year just like the vagaries of Indian monsoon. You, come soon. To Bombay. India. Truly, Aisa.