Midst announcements of beheading carrying a reward of 5-crore-rupees in Digital India, I have started valuing my Head more than money. I have also understood what it means to have your head firmly placed on your shoulders. I have realized the value of an Aadhar card, even if the Aadhar data of Indian citizens leaks on 210 Government websites. After all, 348 years from now, *if* and when some Jay Sheela Bhansali decides to make a movie on my life, no one will be able to raise a question mark about my existence, you know, whether I was fake or real; my Aadhar card will prove my date of birth, address, amount of "black money" deposited in denominations of 500 and 1000-rupees, mobile number, etc. Simple. As for the movie, the script will depict my life's struggles, and my lone survival midst onslaught of demonetization, rising taxation, spiraling inflation and pothole-triggering tyre deflation. Of course, all this will happen 348 years later. Right now, the question is: who distorted History? Sanjay Leela Bhansali? Deepika? Shahid? Ranveer? Or, was it my History teacher at school who distorted answers every time I scored 10 marks of 75 in the History paper? And, how does one protect the honor of a woman? Hope Deepika's Daddy took her for a show of Aamir Khan's Dangal, and also taught her to run fast, real fast, you know, something on the lines of "Beti Bachao, Bhaagna Sikhao"? Huh?! #EkSmileDeZaraMuskuraDeepika #ItihaasHawaHai #WhoMadeMughalEAzam